So often people tell me that they can’t do something because of someone else’s reaction, or the fear of it, or that they do certain things in a certain way because of someone else. And my response to that is almost always, “who’s that about?”
We do not live our lives in isolation, and it is therefore natural that we will often make decisions based on the impact they have on other people, or that our actions will be based on other people’s reactions. However, so often this can filter through into more personal things we do within our own lives, to the extent that we allow other people to hold us back.
Ultimately, if *you* want to achieve something, as long as it is achievable, the only person who realistically can hold you back from doing so is you. Others can tell you the reasons why you shouldn’t do so; other people’s opinions of your abilities might influence your own belief in yourself, but if you fail to move forward because of the opinions/beliefs of others ask yourself, who’s that about?
So often the things we do are about other people, their thoughts, their feelings, their beliefs. But what about *you*? What do you want?
I previously wrote about confidence, and about how that is about what we think about the things we can do. And this ties in with that thought process, because if we are confident we can do something, then the question “who’s that about?” comes back to ourselves. If we are less confident in the things we believe we can do, so often the question comes back to someone else, because it is when we lack confidence that the opinions/beliefs of others can have an impact on that.
Turn the answer to the question around. Make the answer “it’s about me,” and see the difference it will make.